How complicit are you in creating the conditions you say you don’t want? [1]

I’ve written a few times about the stories we tell ourselves. I’ve also discussed how we are characters in those stories. Let’s take that theme a little further.

Think about an issue you are trying to resolve at the moment. One you are finding difficult or frustrating.

Now, here is a list of potential character roles you might be filling in that story [2]:

Can you pick one that resonates for you? Pick one and then answer these questions:

• How does the character you chose, normally act?
• How does being that character have you acting? 
• How are others responding to that character?

Now, pick a different character. Pick one you would like to be in this story and answer these questions:

• How would the new character normally act?
• If you were this character, how would that have you changing your behaviour?
• How would others respond to you if you were that new character?

Repeat the exercise until you find the character, behaviour and response that you are after.

[1] I first heard this question when listening to a podcast hosted by Tim Ferriss. I can’t recall the source of the quote. I would be grateful to anyone who may have more information.

[2] There are many more characters. Which ones haven’t I listed?